It is given that when you are with someone, you would want the compatibility factor with your partner. Compatibility is not about having the same taste in everything or how you agree on things together, but it has more to do with how the person treats you.
There are couples who have completely different personalities and preferences and yet are quite compatible with each other. This stands as the best example of opposites attract.
Whether there have been compatibility issues since the beginning or have recently started cropping up, here are 13 signs to catch and check if you are not compatible with your partner and what to do about it.
1. You Are Way Too Invested
When in a relationship, it is about give and take but when one partner is too invested in the relationship while the other one hardly even remembers the anniversary date, this is also a sign of incompatibility. If you are the one making most of the plans and your partner only follows through, there comes an imbalance in the relationship. Set your priorities straight early on, so that your SO* doesn’t take the things you like for granted.
2. You Don't Know How To Fight
It is okay for couples to fight and argue, but the way these battles are resolved is what helps determine your compatibility. Let’s say, if you start bottling everything up or bicker about it too much, both of these are not the right way to fight. If you are struggling to resolve your fights, by not finding their root, this can be considered as one of the signs of not compatible with your partner too.
3. You Are Unable To Express Yourself
A relationship is about being honest with your partner. But when you hesitate to share things, it may be because your partner shows a lack of interest. One of the reasons why you certainly hesitate is because your partner may not be a good listener. If that’s the case, this is an early sign of you both not being compatible.
4. Your Partner Is Not On Your Side
If your partner likes to play the devil’s advocate and often is on everyone else’s side but yours, it can make you feel dejected and you aren’t wrong. Your partner is supposed to be your biggest cheerleader, and if that’s not happening, you know what it means.
5. You Feel Insecure
A relationship that makes you feel suspicious and not content, is also a sign of lack of compatibility. If the person you are with understands you and tries to acknowledge how you feel about certain things, instead of trying to prove you wrong every time, that’s a healthy relationship.
6. You Have Different Energy Levels
We all work at a different pace. Some people are over enthusiastic while some are laid-back and take things with a pinch of salt. If one is all about experiences and smaller things are at odds, this can also be a constant battle between the couple, which can be a sign of incompatibility.
7. You Have Different Beliefs
You might not always be of the same opinion when it comes to politics, religion, family topics, etc. While it’s okay to have different beliefs, it’s also something that partners respect about each other. This is the way to a healthy relationship. But if you find your partner often criticizes you about your viewpoints, it is a clear sign that you are incompatible.
8. You Don't Feel Yourself
There was a time when it was easy for you to open up with your partner, but due to some of their past actions, you don’t feel yourself anymore in front of them and often find yourself doomed. If you are compatible, you wouldn’t deny or shy away from expressing yourself. This can also be a compatibility issue.
9. You Don't Share The Same Intellectual Level
When your level of knowledge does not match up, it can be pretty frustrating. It can also happen if one of the partners has a lot of degrees, while the other has been unable to garner enough information. If you often feel that your viewpoints aren’t being acknowledged, it can be a sign of intellectual incompatibility.
10. The Future Is Different
Whether you are in the honeymoon phase or have been together for long, knowing what your future looks like is very important. If your dreams and aspirations don’t align, it can lead to fights and arguments in the future. If you see things differently and are not able to find a middle ground, then it is an incompatibility issue.
11. You Don't Admit You're Wrong
It is okay to be stubborn but if you are butting heads often, then the relationship can become very exhausting. It is okay to lose sometimes and feel that you committed a mistake, instead of blaming your partner. When this sort of behavior continues for long, your partner will outgrow you, and eventually, you will become incompatible as well.
12. You Try & Change Each other
The hallmark of a great relationship is when your partner understands who you really are and doesn’t want to change anything about you. But, if the person you are with right now, talks to you about how you talk, or dress, and how you should be in front of people, it is probably because they aren’t okay when you are yourself. In such cases, if you think, the change is not for the betterment, that can also be incompatible.
13. Your Partner Spends More Time With His Friends
Instead of spending time with you, if your partner is constantly hanging with his friends while canceling plans with you, then this can lead to fights and eventually lack of compatibility. In case, this has been an issue for the longest time, then there is no point in staying committed to the partnership.
In the end, no relationships are perfect. It takes effort to make it work but if you are willing to fight it all, it will be worth it. So take time and consider these key points of incompatibility, to know if your SO* is the one for you.