The woman you’re casually dating is married. You may be thinking, “I don’t want to break up a marriage!” Well, the truth of the matter is that it’s not your choice at all – this woman has made her own decision. As a result, she now has an affair on her hands: one with you and one with her husband (assuming he doesn’t know about you).
A relationship comes with a lot of ups and downs. No relationship is easy. If a captain and the crew are in a ship, they have to pilot the ship correctly together, if they don’t wish to drown. The same is with any relationship. However, drowning is inescapable when you date a married woman and don’t know how to handle it. Relationships with a married woman are more complicated than relationships with a single woman. People say you need to sacrifice in relationships, but here you need to be selfish both ways.
Things to Know When Dating a Married Woman
Here are some of the things to know when dating a married woman:-
- One of the first and foremost things you should know is that extramarital affair is casual for most married women. Maybe she wants to meet her sexual pleasure which has faded out in her marriage. Make sure that you want the same, casual and just for your own needs and wants. If you want to get a taste of being in a relationship with a married woman, you can expect your sexual pleasures to be fulfilled.
- A big benefit of dating a married woman is that you can expect maturity in this relationship. That is, you will not have to worry all the time, how to make her happy in a materialistic way. Maybe she has just come into this relationship to fulfill her emotional needs. She does not need all the flowers and chocolates and other gifts. You can count this as one of the few benefits of dating a married woman.
- However, the married woman must have gone into a relationship with you because she has stopped getting those gifts from her husband after marriage. And she expects from you for those things only. However, don’t shower gifts on her daily, it might create havoc in her married life and might wear out her interest from you.
- Maybe she has gone into an extramarital affair with you because she just can’t fit into the expectations of marriage or monogamy. After all, opinions differ and hearts break; both are inevitable.
Be Clear from The Beginning
- Whatever you both want from the relationship, talk about it in the very beginning. Otherwise, you holding high expectations from this affair would be fooling yourself. For a married woman, these types of relationships are just a matter of time. Perhaps she is tired of being selfless and wants some things in her own way now. After that, she will be on her own way and will keep you out of her way.
- In very rare cases only a married woman will leave her married life behind to be in a good relationship with you. So don’t expect a long-term relationship if you are dating a married woman. Also, she might have children to look after, so it will not be easy for her to leave them.
- To keep the relationship a secret she will not let her children, other family members, or other people she knows outside the workplace, come across you. Even if that happens by mistake, she will brush you off as a colleague. You should also maintain the secrecy and go on. You have to accept these facts if you are dating a married woman with a child.
Don’t Be Possessive
- You have to accept that the married woman you are dating does not only belong to you, you are sharing her with another man. You cannot be possessive over her, neither will she, because she knows exactly what she wants and you have to know too. Don’t make the mistake of falling in love with her. It will hurt you only. Set boundaries amongst yourselves. Keep it with no strings attached.
- This is not to keep morality in check. Morality is a suppressed and complicated term to drag in this case. What is moral for others is not for you and vice versa. So maintaining secrecy should be at the top list. Why you, a single man and a married woman, are dating, keep the reasons to yourself. Otherwise, both of your impressions might take a downfall in the workplace.
- In some cases, a married woman might be interested in another man, if her married life has turned out to be abusive and she cannot come out of it. She knows that sooner or later her extramarital affair will end but she might search for a temporary safe place. However, the right thing she can do is divorce her husband. But that’s a whole different issue. The main focus here is your and her reputation. So don’t think of spilling the beans to your colleagues about your ‘secret’ and neither she should.
- To speak the truth, the chances of society maligning her reputation more than yours are more. Because as said before, what is right for you might not be right for others. So if you want to achieve a fair result, you should keep these things in mind.
- Also if the relationship comes out, you have to be prepared for the family drama from her side. Her husband might drag you in that. Your sanity will come into question.
Pros Of Dating a Married Woman
- Married women are more mature and experienced
- The married woman is in a committed relationship, so she’s less likely to cheat on you
- You won’t have to worry about her getting pregnant
- She already has her life set up (a house, car, etc.)
- No problem in getting Intimate
Cons of Dating a Married Woman
- This is adultery and can work against you in case of a divorce
- She may have kids from a previous marriage that you’ll need to get along with
- Her husband may not take kindly to her dating someone new
- She could cheat on you and break your heart
- If she gets pregnant, You cant’s Keep it
- Big expectations from you
- Short term relationship with No future
- Reputation at Stake
How to Stop Dating a Married Woman
Here comes a bit of an intricate part, parting ways. Apart from both of you, Cupid also knows the relationship has arisen from plain lust and fulfilling personal desires. So it’s better to leave each other as soon as your needs have been fulfilled. But what if, she wants to continue the extramarital affair. Steps to end the relationship:
- Face the fact yourself that the relationship cannot go further and you want to end it
- Do not end it over text or on phone call. Ask her to meet you somewhere and be direct about your decision
- Do not stay in touch with her on text, phone calls, or on social media sites. If she is from the same workplace then it might be hard to avoid her. So if you bump into each other after a breakup, keep it formal and restrict the conversations to “hi” and “hello”. But if she is from another workplace then, you don’t have to worry about that.
- It is pretty normal to have flashbacks about the good time you had and you might want to go back. Do not do that. Instead, start focusing on yourself, hang out with your close friends and you may also start dating a single girl. Who knows you might fall in love this time.
- There might be another situation too that the married woman wants to end the relationship before you even thought of that. So in that case, again you have to know and accept the fact that the relationship was not meant to last. Gather your thoughts, speak with each other and respect her decision and end it.
- Here both the parties are bound to respect each other’s decision because both of you went into a relationship on your own. You both didn’t force each other to do it. You both are selfish and you both have to leave each other as the same. Don’t forget to leave all the bridges burnt.
Is it good to have a relationship with a married woman?
It’s possible to date someone who is already in a relationship without being unfaithful yourself. The first thing to do if you find out that if she is taken? Cut off contact immediately! If there are feelings involved then it might be hard but remember that it’s for his sake too because if he finds out about what happened between the two.
Is it OK to date a woman who is separated?
Legally It’s OK ! But if the divorce is not final yet than you are committing adultery which can backfire in the court. If the husband and wife are separated in the eyes of the court then it’s completely normal to date a married woman.
It takes time for new relationships to grow as you are emotionally attached to your previous relationship. Sometimes women tend to behave awkwardly in a new relationship as they are not completely over with the old relationship.
There are several sites for married people who want to have an extramarital affair. You can visit these sites if you are planning to date a married woman then keep all the above points in mind thoroughly. Do some homework before jumping into this, and be an open-minded person from the beginning till the end.